Sometimes, when she was living at home, 24-year-old Louise hit her mum. She would lash out after drinking, and despite periods of calm more incidents would eventually happen.

Louise, whose surname was not revealed, was referred to The Change Project, a commissioned service in Essex which offers behaviour-change interventions to people as young as 16.

Speaking about her experiences in a video posted to Essex Police's YouTube channel, she said the support she received taught her how to recognise her triggers and de-escalate her anger.

She said: "My anger towards my mum started when I was living at home. I wouldn't lash out all the time, but when I've been drinking I would sometimes hit her. At the time I would feel angry, but afterwards I would feel guilty. I would try to make things right by buying my mum flowers. There would be a time when everything was okay, and then something my mum would say or do would trigger me off and I would lash out again.

"I'm working hard on myself to change my behaviour, which will be positive for both of us. Although I don't have contact with my mum at the moment, I know that our relationship will repair and be better in the future."

Launching its Reflect campaign, the Southend Essex and Thurrock Domestic Abuse Board (SETDAB) is encouraging those who are abusive in their relationships and want to change to refer themselves to The Change Project.

Essex Police has had 31,087 reports of domestic abuse in the past year, according to a statement. That's 33% of violent crime and 18.5% of overall recorded crime in the county.

Officials now say the scale of the problem has sparked a change in approach, with agencies working with perpetrators themselves alongside providing support to victims.

Reviewed by victim services like Compass, Next Chapter and Safer Steps, Reflect also aims to educate people about the many forms the crime can take.

Three leading figures in the campaign told the Local Democracy Reporting Service how a perpetrator-focused approach could change thousands of lives.

'Most perpetrators don't want to harm people'

Sarah Griffin, Service Manager at The Change Project, says the charity, which has been running since 2009, has already had successes even before the new campaign.

She said: "If you offer support in the right way, a non judgemental way that is focused on positive change in the future, more people than I probably thought was possible will be accepting of that help."

Sarah Griffin, Service Manager at The Change Project. (Photo: LDRS)

After self-referring or being referred by an agency, the charity carries out assessments which take into account a person's circumstances so their support can be tailored to their situation. Whether a person genuinely wants to change will also be assessed.

Ms Griffin said: "I believe wholeheartedly that most perpetrators don't want to harm their partner, their family member or their children, but may not know how to break the cycle. 

"It's about tapping into that and offering at the end of the day a better relationship. I believe most people want that."

In addition to encouraging people to self-refer, another aim of the campaign is to raise awareness about the different types of domestic abuse. Ms Griffin says the crime is widespread across Essex and affects people of all ages, genders, sexualities and backgrounds.

Consequently, different situations, such as abuse between family members, in LGBTQ+ relationships, in older people and from female perpetrators, require different packages of support from the charity.

'Just arresting people and locking them up isn't the best way to help'

"By focusing on the perpetrator, it's a way of breaking the chain of events and stopping it happening in the first place," says Rachel Nolan, Assistant Chief Constable of Essex Police and vice-chair of SETDAB.

According to ACC Nolan, although policing still plays a role in tackling domestic abuse, it's not the only way of dealing with the problem.

Rachel Nolan, Assistant Chief Constable at Essex Police. (Photo: LDRS)

She said: "We know that not every instance of domestic abuse gets reported to the police and we also know that sometimes just arresting people and locking them up isn't the best way to help that perpetrator or that victim."

Of the 30,000 domestic abuse cases reported to Essex Police last year, one third resulted in arrests. Additionally, roughly half of the 30,000 cases involved repeat victims, and this proportion has been steadily increasing. Stopping repeated incidents is a key part of cracking down on the crime.

Overall reports too have been increasing, however ACC Nolan says this is not necessarily an indicator of the real number of incidents.

She said: "We're not actually that certain whether offences are going up or reporting is going up. If it's reporting going up then that's something I am, in a strange way, pleased with because it means that people are confident to come forward and get the help that they need."

'Society plays an important role'

Deputy Police, Fire and Crime Commissioner for Essex and chair of SETDAB, Jane Gardner told the LDRS that prevention of the "abhorrent" crime is a key priority for the partnership. But she says the community as a whole has to work together for this to happen.

She said: "I think society plays an important role and I think schools play a really important role in terms of education around healthy relationships. 

"We commission services to come into schools to do that work with our young people. It's important that they understand what a healthy relationship looks like and it's important that they are learning to make choices and to speak out if they feel the relationship they are in is not healthy."

Jane Gardner, Deputy Police, Fire and Crime Commissioner for Essex. (Photo: LDRS)

Ms Gardner stresses that this is not an either-or situation, victim support continues to be provided alongside the counselling offered to perpetrators. In fact, many perpetrators are or have been victims themselves, further complicating the picture.

Victims need support, but the best thing for victims, according to SETDAB and The Change Project, is for the crime to not happen at all.

Ms Gardner said: "We want to stop this, we don't want victims of this crime in Essex. I'm not so naïve to think that there will never be this type of crime but we absolutely can work together to reduce it further.

"To make it easy for perpetrators to get the help they need and make it easier for victims to access services so that they feel fully supported and to educate people into what this crime is and how that they can support and help as well."